This technique is the Third Stage which consists of analysing and recalling all the things said to you 

which have caused hurt and damage somewhere in your life and have made you feel inadequate. 

See examples below which you may also have experienced.

FATHER

"You will never amount to anything".

"I wouldn't even believe you could do it unless you showed me".

"Where did you get thatidea from".

MOTHER

"You're going to need me".

"You don't care about me".

"I just don't understand you!.

AUNTY

" That's not even done properly" (and you did do it properly).

"If you like that sort of thing"

GRANDMOTHER

"Looks like you've put on weight again".

"Well it's not what I would have chosen".